Recovering from Spiritual Narcissism – Part 5
A spiritual narcissist uses religion and spirituality to justify his sinful desires instead of using it to take ownership of his life as God intended. One technique he uses to accomplish this is applying the scriptures mainly to others instead of self. When listening to a sermon, he will not think about making changes in his life. Instead, he mentally lists people that he desires to change: family, friends, neighbors, church members. He will not talk directly to them because that would risk exposing his hypocrisy as they can see his life much clearer than he can. He cannot see clearly his own life since he is blinded by desires to justify his behavior. So, he makes a passive-aggressive plan to “correct” them. He may ask the preacher to teach on a specific topic, talk to the elders, inform some “authority,” or gossip about their behavior. This only serves to reinforce his narcissism because he has “done something” about the perceived problem, and now feels self-justified.
Why does he do this? This behavior permits him to focus on others’ lives instead of his own. His judgmental attitude is “justified” because he is allegedly doing God’s work. He reasons: God wants us to tell other people what the scriptures say, right? It is true that God wants us to talk to others about the scriptures, but we must be “poor in spirit” in our attitude (Matthew 5:3). The spiritual narcissist does not have this attitude, and so he twists the scriptures to his own destruction (2 Peter 3:16), as he applies the scriptures to others while seeking to justify his own sinful behavior. To change, he must first recognize his own spiritual poverty. This will cause him to focus on his own sin instead of others.
God bless you, and I love you.
Kevin Cauley