Patterns of Communication
Men and women do not think or communicate in the same ways. They have different patterns of thinking, and that translates to different ways of saying things. Men are like waffles. They tend to compartmentalize their thoughts and group them into categories. One of the shortfalls of this way of thinking is that some relevant information does not get considered and produces shortsighted decisions. It is thought to be outside of the waffle square. Women, on the other hand, are like spaghetti. They tend to bring in many interconnected thoughts with everything. Sometimes they are only tangentially relevant. This leads to exploring many thoughts that are not germane. One of the shortfalls of this way of thinking is that it considers too much information and may lead to decision paralysis. Men and women need to help one another to make good decisions. Men need to hear additional information that women can provide. Women need limitations on information that men can provide. Together, working as a team, they complement one another.
Good communication skills require planning, patience, and practice. One cannot resolve all communication issues overnight. Sometimes, it takes time to think and to understand. We may need to broach the topic multiple times to communicate clearly. Set a time when there are no other disturbances to discuss serious issues away from children’s curious ears. Write down some things that you want to communicate before you sit down with your spouse. When both spouses resolve to talk about things in a productive way where trust is paramount, God is honored, marriages greatly improve, and families become more spiritual. Good things happen from good communication. The family has peace. Spouses grow closer to each other, and children learn to resolve conflicts in a productive way.
God bless you, and I love you.
Kevin Cauley