“But to Love One Another”

1. Read: Romans 13:8-10

2. About the Text:

1) We are all born into relationships when we enter the world.

2) It is unavoidable.

3) Our first relationships are with our family.

4) We then make friends our own age.

5) Eventually, we connect with many others at work, church, and play.

6) With the online world, it is possible to have more relationships than ever before!

3. How does God want us to manage our relationships?

1) God wants us to build relationships.

2) In fact, God Himself is the greatest builder of relationships.

3) Read Ephesians 2:13-19.

4) God wants us to have a great relationship with Him, and with one another.

5) How do we do that?

6) This is what Romans 13:8 is about: having good relationships based upon God’s creation.

4. Ref. to S, T, P, O, and A.

1. “Owe no one anything . . . .” – What it doesn’t mean.

1) The word “owe” has the idea of debt or obligation.

2) It doesn’t mean financial debt.

a. Some use this verse to talk about financial debt.

b. I do not believe that this is what Paul is referring to here.

c. Sometimes it is necessary to obtain loans for one purpose or another.

d. Paul isn’t prohibiting that.

3) It doesn’t mean making a commitment to something.

a. We make commitments to our jobs, spouses, children, church, etc.

b. This is right and good.

c. “But let your speech be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: and whatsoever is more than these is of the evil one” (Matthew 5:37).

2. What does the expression mean?

1) Paul is referring to a system of pleasing people through owing personal favors.

2) Sometimes we refer to this as the quid pro quo system or the emotional bank account system.

3) I do something for you, and you in turn do something for me.

4) We may think this behavior harmless, but it can become spiritually damaging.

5) It leads to using people instead of loving them for their being created in God’s image (Genesis 1:27).

6) It leads to seeing people as tools instead of persons.

7) It creates artificial standards for personal relationships.

8) It creates constant worry on the part of the one who is seeking to please others

9) It creates legalistic demands.

10) It results in pettiness and possessiveness.

11) It is a selfish system.

3. Seeking to please people is impossible.

1) We can’t do it consistently.

2) We can’t know if we are pleasing others.

3) We create false standards of acceptance.

4) Such a system ultimately competes with pleasing God.

4. We construct such a system in order to measure our relationships, but such a system simply destroys relationships and spiritually destroys us also.

1. God’s Purpose for Man – “Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.” (Matthew 22:37-40)

2. Sometimes we have misplaced love.

1) Possessiveness is often confused with love.

2) God owns everything – “The earth is the LORD’S, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein” (Psalm 24:1).

3) This false sense of ownership is nothing more than human pride.

4) It results in a confusion of identity, because we identify with what we pride ourselves on.

5) True love doesn’t behave in a possessive way.

3. God defines true love for us in His word.

1) 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 “Love suffereth long, and is kind; love envieth not; love vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not its own, is not provoked, taketh not account of evil; rejoiceth not in unrighteousness, but rejoiceth with the truth; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. Love never faileth.”

2) We all want to be treated like this, but we really need to focus on ourselves and treating others like this.

3) Real love is full of graciousness. “For if ye love them which love you, what thank/grace have ye? for sinners also love those that love them. And if ye do good to them which do good to you, what thank/grace have ye? for sinners also do even the same. And if ye lend to them of whom ye hope to receive, what thank/grace have ye? for sinners also lend to sinners, to receive as much again. But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil” (Luke 6:32-35).

4. Love is truly generous and giving and seeks nothing in return, unlike how people construct relationships.

1. God wants us to be free from anxiety in relationships.

1) A lot of our anxiety is self-imposed.

2) We assume much and communicate little.

3) “In nothing be anxious; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God” (Phil.4:6).

2. God wants us to be free from systems of law.

1) The above humanly constructed system of pleasing people through owing person favors is a system of law that is impossible to fulfill.

2) “For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death” (Romans 8:2).

3. God wants us to be free from the dominion of sin.

1) The system of please people through owing personal favors actually encourages sins such as pride, envy, and anger.

2) “For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace” (Romans 6:14).

4. God wants us to be free from humanly constructed expectations.

1) This includes our own ambition and envy.

2) This also includes others’ political expectations of us.

5. God wants us to be free from humanly devised morality.

1) Jeremiah 10:23

2) Proverbs 3:5-6

6. What God is doing in all of this is saving us from ourselves.

7. God liberates our relationships by getting us to focus upon loving Him and loving our neighbor.

1) When we love others, we give ourselves away to others without charge, without expecting anything in return.

2) When we love others, we are gracious with others, favoring them.

3) As Paul says, “Love worketh no ill to his neighbour: therefore love is the fulfilling of the law” (Romans 13:10).

1. “Owe no one anything except to love one another.”

1) People construct relationships based upon personal favors and obligations-tit for tat.

2) God created relationships to be initiated and sustained by love.

3) God liberates our relationships by restoring us to His divine pattern of love instead of man’s constructed relationships of personal favors and obligations and this frees us from all of the humanly devised and imposed legalisms that we place upon one another.

2. Invitation